Archive for June, 2008

what ever happened to you and me?

{ June 25, 2008 @ 4:55 pm } · { Solitude }
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First I want to congratulate myself for passing the Civil Service Exam. I’m so happy I’m doing cartwheels in my head. No. Not really.

 

Secondly, I wanted to apologize for being incommunicado for about a week. Actually, I wasn’t. I just wasn’t into writing mode if you know what I mean. Writer’s block. Whatever.

 

My friends and I were supposed to go to Camotes to spend an overdue and much needed summer breakaway but no. I forgot that this month is June. June’s like the opening of typhoon season. Kids are jumping up and down because classes could be cancelled with no imminent warning. And… blackboards may be wet. Ugh! I hate being an adult. Could I just be a student forever? Struggling over Java exams and mind boggling programming codes I can take but struggling to make a living? No. Scratch that. Make that “find” a living. Oh this shit is beyond what we call everyday challenges. This is like the ultimate challenge, the mother of all challenges, Fear-Factor-never-saw-this-coming kind of challenge…

 

Shut. Up. Get over it. The rest of them did. So should you. Thank you my dear self. I needed that.

 

Where was I before my mindless ranting? Ah yes. Camotes. I was so looking forward to two days of worry-free, fun-filled adventure. Darn that Frank. No. Not my dad. Duh! The typhoon. So I was just stuck at home for the past weekend listening to the wind ravishing the trees outside. Stop! That sounds so revolting. Anyway, it did not rain that Saturday night so my family and I, along with the rest of my relatives, went to church. My cousin was rambling about the forthcoming August 08. She said she wanted to get married that day. I think this may have been because eight is her favorite number and getting married at that date would mean she’s uhm…getting married on 08-08-08. Get it? August 08, 2008.

 

The funny thing was she’s never had a boyfriend before, never cared to have one and probably won’t ever have one if she can help it. Then why the hell was she planning to get married on the said date? Beats me. In more ways than one, like our looks perhaps (except the height. ALWAYS except the height. Sarcasm inserted here.), we’re a lot alike. Like never having a boyfriend and obviously being neurotic. That may be a bit harsh. Eccentric is a much better word. Runs in the family, I guess.

 

To top it all off, she said that if getting married on 08-08-08 can’t be possible then she’ll try again on 12-12-12. December 12, 2012. She’ll be 29 at that time. Personally, I’d like to get married somewhere in between like 10-10-10 (October 10, 2010) or 11-11-11 (November 11, 2011). But as you know, marriage is really not my thing. Some say I that I have a problem with commitment. Glares. I do not. It’s just that I haven’t found the man I want to spend the rest of my life with. Or maybe I did but it’s just not possible. Or maybe we both just don’t know it yet. Discussion closed.

 

 

P.S.

So…What ever happened to you and me?

thunder

{ June 18, 2008 @ 5:19 pm } · { Solitude }
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My friend Bambi introduced me to this song by Boys Like Girls and now I can’t seem to get the song out of my head. I’m hooked! Thanks bro! :)

Thunder
Boys Like Girls

Today is a winding road that’s taking me to places that I didn’t want to go
Today in the blink of an eye I’m holding on to something and I do not know why
I tried

I tried to read between the lines
I tried to look in your eyes
I want a simple explanation
For what I’m feeling inside
I gotta find a way out
Maybe there’s a way out

Your voice was the soundtrack of my summer
Do you know you’re unlike any other?
You’ll always be my thunder, and I said
Your eyes are the brightest of all the colors
I don’t wanna ever love another
You’ll always be my thunder
So bring on the rain
And bring on the thunder

Today is a winding road
Tell me where to start and tell me something I don’t know
Today I’m on my own
I can’t move a muscle and I can’t pick up the phone
I don’t know (I don’t know, I don’t know, I don’t know)

And now I’m itching for the tall grass
And longing for the breeze
I need to step outside
Just to see if I can breathe
I gotta find a way out
Maybe theres a way out

Your voice was the soundtrack of my summer
Do you know you’re unlike any other?
You’ll always be my thunder, and I said
Your eyes are the brightest of all the colors
I don’t wanna ever love another
You’ll always be my thunder
So bring on the rain

Yeah I’m walking on a tightrope
I’m wrapped up in vines
I think we’ll make it out
But you just gotta give me time
Strike me down with lightning
Let me feel you in my veins
I wanna let you know how much I feel your pain

Today is a winding road that’s taking me to places that I didn’t want to go
Whoa

Your voice was the soundtrack of my summer
Do you know you’re unlike any other?
You’ll always be my thunder, and I said
Your eyes are the brightest of all the colors
I don’t wanna ever love another
You’ll always be my thunder
So bring on the rain
And bring on the thunder, and I said
Your voice was the soundtrack of my summer
Do you know you’re unlike any other?
You’ll always be my thunder
So bring on the rain
Oh baby bring on the pain
And listen to the thunder

this is for you. you know who you are…
 

pause to breathe

{ June 13, 2008 @ 4:07 pm } · { Solitude }
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In the last few minutes before this day draws into a close, I would just like to shout out to the world that I just turned 24 and very proud of it. Or not. Kidding. I’m 22. (whistles)

Just like the line in a song, “The best things in life are free.” Oh yeah. They sure are. I may not have had the best birthday party to top all birthday parties but I sure had a blast today. I am blessed to continue to live and be surrounded by people who love me. Kudos to my mom and dad and my brother too. They don’t even have to come bearing gifts. Their birthday greetings (texts, calls or verbal greetings) were so much better than any wrapped present I ever had.

Tomorrow, I’ll go back to my self loathing, job hunting hating persona. Hahaha!

rainy days

{ June 12, 2008 @ 5:04 pm } · { Uncategorized }
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I lurve the rainy days. The lightning (natural fireworks in the sky), the thunder (oohh sexayyyyy…) and of course the rhythmic sound that raindrops make. The angrier they fall, the better. But there’s just one thing i hate about rainy days.

Frogs.

Slimey, green little hopping monsters! I killed four of their kind today. I know, I know. Apologies to the Big Man up there. I respect the whole circle of life thing but this is too much. Hopping incessantly without a care in the world. Newslash. You’re in my property. Have a little respect. Hike up your skirts (if you have any, pfft!) then get the hell away from here.

Death Toll update: 5

I know why they’re invading me. They’re probably laughing at me for being a loser with no life. I’m going to say this only once so listen to me very carefully. I read this somewhere. Never take life seriously. You never get out of it alive anyway. And I do have a job. My job is to track down all them frogs out there and pound them till they are no more.

Geesh! Before anyone can peg me for being an insane loser, I take it back. I’m kidding. I love frogs. I love Kermit. He’s a sweetie.

Death Toll update: still 5…and counting!

By the way, happy birthday to me. I’ve been meaning to dance in the rain with only my birthday suit on but nah! Even slimey, green little hopping monsters don’t deserve that sight. too…hmm, what’s that word? Vile.

word of the day

{ June 11, 2008 @ 9:14 am } · { Word Nerd }
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I learned an interesting word today while we (my dad, mom and I) were on our way back from Toledo.

Furlough n.

- used mostly by soldiers as a preferred term over the usual leave of absence.

I learned this from my dad who is a retired soldier. So when somebody asks you where the hell you’ve been, just tell them, “I took my well deserved furlough.” Pretty cool, huh?

word of the day

{ June 6, 2008 @ 2:10 am } · { Word Nerd }
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Lulz

Is a plural variation of L.O.L. or laugh out loud. Originally a typo which eventually evolved into something that means funny internet content or laughter at the expense of others.

Usually associated to the catchphrase, “I did it for the lulz” which is the mother of all excuses, the reason that could probably get you away with anything incriminating.

If somebody asks you why you decided to rob a liquor store, just tell them you did it for the lulz.

once more witH feelings

{ June 5, 2008 @ 7:23 am } · { Solitude }
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Woke up around 8am. I could’ve slept tHrough till 10. What’s the matter with me? Ah yes. The monthly visitor is at it again. Gone are the fits, emotional outbursts and the seemingly endless questions on my sanity. Or maybe just the first two are gone. Whatever.

 

First thing I did, once I drowned the Pain located in the lower extremes of my body (don’t ask), was to grab my newly bought *SoPhie Kinsella book, The Undomestic Goddess and read to my heart’s content. Until the pain becomes unbearable again. Insert whimper here. Since having breakfast was out of the question, can’t really eat when You can only feel the pain, I decided to immerse in the book even more. See reading is a means of escape from reality or in this case, from mensTrual pains. There’s just something comforting with picturing tHe characters and the scenery in my head.

 

The Undomestic Goddess is all about Samantha Sweeting, a workaholic lawyer whose only dream is to be partner in this hot shot firm she’s working at. But then she mAde a huge mistake, the only mistake she made, causing her to have some sort of meltdown and retreat from the city. Having no idea where she was, she accidentally landed herself a job as a housekeePer. She then met Nathaniel the gardener. He introduced her to his mother so she could learn everything there is to know about being a housekeeper. Then after the rather disastrous event in her life, she managed to pick up the Pieces and snag a man in the process.

 

Now whY can’t I be like that? I am in the brink of my pre-midlife crisis here. I should be able to find love, get a kick aSs job then yell at my old life sayIng, “Booyah! Many thanKs for the termination.” Or something along thosE lines but no. I am forced to live the bittEr life of the unemployed and the nightmare that is job hunting. Perfect…not!

 

 

*Sophie Kinsella is the New York Time’s bestselling author of the Shopaholic novels

Title courtesy of Placebo’s album title

 

Lord Byron

{ June 4, 2008 @ 5:21 am } · { Solitude }
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A realization hit me as cold as ice (and yet another attempt with poetry)…

The shivers down my spine were bitter with fear
Threatening to fall down are my tears
My vocal cords are constricted
My broken heart is conflicted
Eyes looking forward but seeing none.

That entire stanze took me an hour and a half to write. That’s an enormous amount of time to rack my brains just to take my point across when what I’m really trying to say is that my life sucks because some guy broke my heart again (Well, not just some guy. It’s THE guy so it hurts even more). That only took five seconds flat to think and another five to type in. So I’ll stick to creative writing. Way, way better than poetry.

Here’s a Lord Byron original, an excerpt from SO WE’LL GO NO MORE A ROVING:

For the sword outwears the sheath,
And the soul wears out the breast,
And the heart must pause to breathe,
And Love itself have rest.

Mine just pales in comparison so I’m giving poetry a rest. But isn’t men who dig poetry the best?

Blue Screen of Death

{ June 3, 2008 @ 8:15 am } · { Uncategorized }
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lately i’ve been a recluse. i have made my bedroom a sanctuary, even the rays of the sun are forbidden. sometimes i welcome the company of people which includes the parentals, my brother and the housekeeper. what, you may ask, is this self imposed reclusion for? i have no friggin’ idea. probably to internalize being unemployed. (dull)

this is the result of trying to write a poem. but alas, me and poetry just don’t mingle.

so i learned a new thing today. the blue screen of death. creepy! it’s like an apocalypse thing but for the computer. my friend had a real laugh about it. turned out, i nearly killed my aunt’s laptop. thank God for small miracles like Ian.

Blue Screen of Death – (also known as a stop error, BSoD or bluescreen) is an error screen displayed by certain operating system, most notably Microsoft Windows, after encountering a critical system error which can cause the system to shut down to prevent damage. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Blue_Screen_of_Death)